Your experience deserves to be heard
Abuse can occur in relationships across sexual orientations and gender identities. It may involve the same patterns of power and control seen in other relationships, alongside tactics tied to sexuality, identity, or gender expression.
Identity can be used as a tool of control
- Threatening involuntary disclosure of your identity or relationship.
- Using shame, misgendering, or identity-related insults to undermine you.
- Manipulating access to affirming care, community, or support.
- Exploiting fear of discrimination or rejection to isolate you.
- Claiming no one will believe you or that services will not support you.
- Controlling how you express your gender or sexuality.
Barriers are not your fault
Discrimination, isolation, and difficulty locating affirming services can make reaching out harder. These barriers do not make the abuse less serious. You decide what to share and with whom, and you do not have to disclose your identity publicly to deserve support.
Consider resources that fit your needs
The National Domestic Violence Hotline serves people of all genders and sexual orientations. Ask an advocate about affirming resources in your area. RAINN also provides sexual-violence support and resources for LGBTQ+ survivors. Service availability and eligibility should be confirmed with the organization directly.
Support, at your own pace
Survivors are never responsible for managing, correcting, treating, or changing the behavior of someone who abuses them. Support does not depend on staying, reconciling, or participating in joint education.